ashley's tall and gorgeous,
katie's smart and cute,
i am fat and ugly,
and my mom says i'm crude,
karissa's perfect too;
she gets all the guys,
but there's nothing good about me,
and i'm not telling lies,
emily is really nice,
she loves to be supportive,
i guess that really helps
when i know i don"t deserve to live,
they sometimes say i'm beautiful,
or that i have nice eyes,
but i know theyre just being nice
cuz its all LIES LIES LIES
why is it that everyone
is perfect except me?
i just want to fit in
or be whatever i can be
maybe this razor
will help me deal with the pain
but i won't tell anyone,
they'll think im totally insane,
and with a slash to my wrist,
i feel better already,
i love to see the blood,
its like a bunch of confetti
now i can focus on something
besides the emotional pain,
i focus on the physical,
which isn't quite as lame,
but after a few minutes,
i feel bad again,
i think about all my friends,
and how i'll never fit in
i stare at myself in the mirror,
and wish it would all end,
i look back at the razor,
and take it in my hand
i hold it to my wrist
while shaking violently
scared to take my life,
scared of what will be,
i think for a minute,
and decide to just do it,
i hold the razor to my vein,
and slash myself again,
i suddenly collapse,
everything goes black,
i totally regret it,
but i've screwed it up, again..
        then there's this one thats even worse..

isit in dark, i'm all alone
i feel the cold surround me.
thoughts fill my mind, unforgotten sorrows,
why wont they just let me be?
i see it glimmer, i see it shine
my old friend razor in my hand.
if only i could control myself...
all common sense falls through like sand.
i feel it peirce, i feel it sting
and my eyes begin to tear.
now i feel no pain, i'm almost numb
i've gotta get out of here.

          Yeh * now you knoe somewhat how i've been feelin lately. Me nd Craig got into a fiight;; got pist at me threw me against my wall.. long story short* we're over. I'ma go to bedd- I'm out peacee